Happy Birthday to…. me?

I haven’t written in here for a while. That could partially because I currently run another blog where my attention is focused full time. It could also be because since my focus has been on that, I haven’t really thought much about world and societal issues – until recently. Certain things have been bugging me a lot.

People in particular. So guess what; I’m back! Time to rant.

People

Okay as you know, I kind of really hate people. They are rude and annoying, and being around them only lets me down. I like to be alone because no one ever lets me down or disappoints me. I find I am the loneliest when surrounded by other people. Ironic isn’t it?

10306182_710418875681927_5575570629644871420_nSo what do you do when you are ALWAYS doing things for other people, and you never get things back in return? I always say ‘always do, and never expect’, but there comes a point where always doing and never getting ANYTHING including appreciation can get really damn tiring.

I have three good friends. For 1 of their birthdays, I got them a $60 Pandora charm, made a lovely collage card, and brought it to their house on their birthday. For the 2nd friend, I paid over $100 to take the train to go visit them at school, made them a big collage card, and a mixed tape with all of our favourite songs. For the 3rd friend, I made a big collage card, got them some treats and desserts, and some little gifts, and drove an hour to her University to surprise her.

And what did I get for my birthday? The 1st friend brought me a little card and a cook book, but other than that – nothing. How upsetting do you think that is? And how do you think that makes me feel? Loved? Appreciated? Hell no. I feel like shit, like no one cares about me or appreciates my friendship or the things I do. Oh and did I mention I was in Hawaii, broke my arm, and then got sick in bed for 5 days? Yep, pretty much went through hell on my birthday. But do you think anyone came to see me or visit once I got home? Ha, NOPE!

I also always do little things for everyone’s birthdays, whether it be a card, a gift card to their favourite store, a little present, or baked goods – always. And this one guy I got a card and gift card for his birthday couldn’t even wish me a happy birthday on mine. And this other  guy I’m currently planning a surprise welcome home party for, who is a good friend of mine, didn’t even wish me a happy birthday either. Wow. People are so lovely.

I know what you’re thinking – stop doing things then. Okay okay, I’ll try, but it’s just hard alright? I’m a genuine nice person who genuinely ENJOYS doing things for people and making them smile. But I guess I’ll have to slow down the kindness if all I’m getting in return is dirt.

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