the feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something; firm trust.
having an excessive or erotic interest in oneself and one’s physical appearance.
excessively proud of oneself; vain.
having or showing an excessively high opinion of one’s appearance, abilities, or worth.
conceited or arrogant, especially in a bold or impudent way.
“There are so many different kinds of beautiful. Did you know that only 33% of women believe they are beautiful? That’s 67% too little. Positive self image is completely underrated. We need to get young girls and women to be proud in their own skin. I’m pledging to go make-up free on Friday August 29th to take a stand against negative body image. Join me by registering at makeupfreeme.com.au.”
Now, while she did receive positive feedback from that post, she also received many negative comments, including things like “easy for you to say, you’re a model” and “she’s so vain posting this”.
Yes, I believe that those things are true, but I also do believe she has a point. It’s just so hard now a days to tell what is confidence and what is narcissism. So that’s what this post is about.
Confidence vs. Narcissism
I believe that confidence is feeling happy in your own skin. Confidence is wearing a smile or keeping your shoulders back and your head held high. People need confidence at certain times, like when they’re doing a presentation in front of the class, or going to talk to a boy you like. You have to have confidence in yourself, and you have to be confident. Because of course you don’t want to be shy and self conscious, right?
Narcissism is completely different. It’s not only seeing the good in yourself, but loving it a bit too much. I don’t want to use the word obsessed, but I do believe that some people are truly obsessed with themselves; who they are, and their appearance. That is where words like cocky, vain, and conceited come in. Narcissists think that they are better than others and don’t care if they show it. To be a narcissist and love yourself is a bad thing.
So… when people tell girls to love themselves and be confident, you can see why there is a bit of confusion there. Their little minds are racing going, “okay, I’m trying to be confident and love myself, but that girl over their posted a selfie and everyone says she’s full of her self and is being narcissistic.. do I hide in the corner and be shy, or do I act like I love myself???”
I think there is a line that we have to draw between confident and cocky. When adding an innocent photo of yourself turns into a self righteous photo shoot in the mirror with a duck face.
Adding 1 photo of your self smiling nicely.
Adding a photo of yourself every single today posing like a model.
Tons of girls do it – and they get thousands, if not millions of likes for it. So I’m just not sure what society wants. Shy self conscious girls, or cocky, full of themselves girls? Because people seem to criticize and love both.
I guess there really isn’t pleasing everybody though.
So just be yourself, whatever that may be, and love what you do, regardless of what anyone else thinks. (Because their opinions don’t matter- only you do.)